Ambleside Blog

"What a Bouquet!"

Harmony in our Efforts––Such a recognition of the work of the Holy Spirit as the Educator of mankind, in things intellectual as well as in things moral and spiritual, gives us 'new thoughts of God, new hopes of Heaven,' a sense of harmony in our efforts and of acceptance of all that we are. What stands between us and the realisation of this more blessed life? This; that we do not realise ourselves as spiritual beings invested with bodies, living, emotional, a snare to us and a joy to us, but which are, after all, the mere organs and interpreters of our spiritual intention. Once we see that we are dealing spirit with spirit with the friend at whose side we are sitting, with the people who attend to our needs, we shall be able to realise how incessant is the commerce between the divine Spirit and our human spirit. It will be to us as when one stops one's talk and one's thoughts in the springtime, to find the world full of bird-music unheard the instant before. In like manner we shall learn to make pause in our thoughts, and shall hear in our intellectual perplexities, as well as in our moral, the clear, sweet, cheering and inspiring tones of our spiritual Guide. We are not speaking here of what is commonly called the religious life, or of our definite approaches to God in prayer and praise; these things all Christian people comprehend more or less fully; we are speaking only of the intellectual life, the development of which in children is the aim of our subjects and methods of instruction.[1]

Homeschooling is challenging and requires much sacrifice to do it well. Practicing Charlotte Mason’s philosophy of education at home is additionally challenging in that being faithful to this work necessitates that the parent-teacher engage with the texts and materials and actively participate alongside the children. This often occupies much of the day as well as time to prepare apart from lesson time. This work is not to be taken lightly and beckons one to such virtues as patience, fortitude, and temperance.

As followers of Christ, we know that children are a gift from God. And not only are children a gift, “they are like arrows in a warrior’s hands” . . . and one should be joyful “if his quiver is full of them.” And we are. But sometimes, in the day-to-day routine, we may need to be reminded of the preciousness of the gift of a “full quiver.”

An Ambleside homeschool mother shares a poem born out of struggle and inspired by an idea from a wise and winsome priest--a priest “who didn’t look on me in sympathy when I said I have seven daughters but instead said, “What a Bouquet!” In a moment, three simple words shed a better light on a year’s work of daily lessons and nurturing and mending relationships. In her poem, she describes each daughter as a unique flower in a beautiful bouquet, purposefully turning her thoughts from frustration to what is good, and true, and beautiful. How lovely our thoughts and actions may be when directed toward God with a simple idea of finding beauty in struggle and contentment with our lot, whatever these may be. May this be an encouragement and a reminder to “not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap . . .”[2]

*  *  *  *  *

Sunflower

Her petals attract the rays of sunshine that have travelled through the heavens just for her.

She moves only to be receptive to her gift from above.

 

Ivy

She winds her way on and forward finding the smallest of homes for her tendrils.

Then she holds on tenaciously, courageously, growing in impossible places.

 

Peony

How extravagant she is! She holds nothing back, sharing herself completely.

 

Rose

She is the reward of the most patient of caretakers. She is abundant in the hands of a master

who lives to witness her blooms, her full perfection.

 

Carnation

She is hearty and careless for herself, sacrificing herself often for the whims and cares of others.

 

Forget-Me-Not

Every petal she has is so small and delicate, forming each flower, then strung together like a river that starts

with a drop of water and eventually carves and shapes rock itself.

 

Violet

Purple--royal--sacrifice. She can be found in average places; always a remembrance that often

there is extraordinary in the ordinary.

 

Daffodil

She knows what it takes to push through, to grow. She knows how fragile she is but doesn't save herself

for a better time or an easier life. She will find a way.

 

Lily

She is simply lovely, not needing to draw attention, but able to stand as she is.

Knowing she is all she will ever need to be.

 

Dandelion

She won't take no for an answer, but persists unceasingly for a spot with her sisters.

 

What a bouquet!

Each is so different, a bounty of beauty in many forms.

If the rose said, "My beauty is complete." Would it diminish the beauty of the daffodil?

It could not, for beauty is not a thing to be had but a gift bestowed.

It can be appreciated, mimicked, ignored, neglected, or desired, but the purpose of beauty is always the same:

to reflect its source.

 



[1] Mason, Charlotte. Parents and Children. London, England: Kegan Paul, Trench, Trubner and Co. Ltd., 1904.

[2] Galatians 6:9

Image "Violette Heymann" by Odilon Redon

 

Bruised Too Often

“He had perhaps been bruised too often.  The peace of the vast aloof scrub had drawn him with the beneficence of its silence.  Something in him was raw and tender.  The touch of men was hurtful upon it, but the touch of the pines was healing.  Making a living came harder there, distances were troublesome in the buying of supplies and the marketing of crops.  But the clearing was peculiarly his own.  The wild animals seemed less predatory to him than people he had known.  The forays of bear and wolf and wild-cat and panther on stock were understandable, which was more than he could say of human cruelties.”[1]

When I read this text with my students, our response for a time was silence. 

It was one of those golden moments where our souls met in wordless communion with the Holy Spirit and one another. 

It is no wonder that Penny Baxter wanted his son, Jody, to encounter nature’s beneficence too.  And encounter it he did.  The author of The Yearling, Majorie Kinnan Rawlings, details Jody’s encounters with such eloquence that the reader aches with nostalgia, despite never having been to the swamps and springs of Florida.  And these encounters leave marks long into life.  For example, after one spring day in April spent beside the water’s edge, Ms. Rawlings describes Jody:

He pictured Old Slewfoot, the great black outlaw bear with one toe missing, rearing up in his winter bed and tasting the soft air and smelling the moonlight, as he, Jody, smelled and tasted them. He went to bed in a fever and could not sleep. A mark was on him from the day’s delight, so that all his life, when April was a thin green and the flavor of rain was in his tongue, an old wound would throb and nostalgia would fill him for something he could not quite remember. A whip-poor-will called across the bright night, and suddenly he was asleep. (emphasis mine)

We have each known the bruising of which Penny Baxter speaks.  Who is not raw and tender in places?  Who of our students hasn't been bruised?  What student may come to class having recently experienced a “troublesome” part of life, or even the predatory nature of someone close?  As teachers, we cannot always know.  But how would our reverence for each subject grow knowing that the Holy Spirit knows each bruised heart and speaks through each text, sometimes in profound communion?

Would we be more earnest to not pass over the ideas in nature study, poetry, or math each day?  Would we be more attuned to the “beneficence of silence” in our response time?

“From the flower in the crannied wall to the glorious firmament on high, all the things

of Nature proclaim without ceasing, ‘Great and marvelous are thy works, Lord God Almighty.’ ”[2]

God proclaims himself through each subject of our curriculum.  “Great and marvelous” is our God for the healing of the “bruised too often.”  Let us provide the space and leave room for the healing.

 



[1] The Yearling, p. 18

[2] Vol. 4, Book 2, p. 100

Illustration by Wyeth, N. C. (Newell Convers), 1882-1945

Loyalty to the King

There is little, if anything, that brings such sweetness to the soul of devout Christian parents as their children’s allegiance to the risen Savior King. And, few things are so harrowing as the prospect that one’s child might abandon Him, who is the Source of all life and goodness. Thus, parents possessing a vibrant devotion to Christ cannot help but ponder the means of cultivating such devotion in their children. Children are a sacred mystery and their formation a sacred duty. How precisely is this duty to be fulfilled? Consider Charlotte Mason’s conclusion to her first book, Home Education:

The Essence of Christianity is Loyalty to a Person –– Christ, our King. Here is a thought to unseal the fountains of love and loyalty, the treasures of faith and imagination, bound up in the child. The very essence of Christianity is personal loyalty, passionate loyalty to our adorable Chief. We have laid other foundations––regeneration, sacraments, justification, works, faith, the Bible––any one of which, however necessary to salvation in its due place and proportion may become a religion about Christ and without Christ. And now a time of sifting has come upon us, and thoughtful people decline to know anything about our religious systems; they write down all our orthodox beliefs as things not knowable. Perhaps this may be because, in thinking much of our salvation, we have put out of sight our King, the divine fact which no soul of man to whom it is presented can ignore. In the idea of Christ is life; let the thought of Him once get touch of the soul, and it rises up, a living power, independent of all formularies of the brain. Let us save Christianity for our children by bringing them into allegiance to Christ, the King. How? How did the old Cavaliers[1] bring up sons and daughters, in passionate loyalty and reverence for not too worthy princes? Their own hearts were full of it; their lips spake it; their acts proclaimed it; the style of their clothes, the ring of their voices, the carriage of their heads––all was one proclamation of boundless devotion to their king and his cause. That civil war, whatever else it did, or missed doing, left a parable for Christian people. If a Stuart prince could command such measure of loyalty, what shall we say of "the Chief amongst ten thousand, the altogether lovely”?

Notice the primacy placed on loyalty, something more than mere belief and mere behavior. As important as right believing and right doing are, they must flow from right devotion. One may appear perfect in doctrine and in deed; yet be principally loyal to self and thus animated by a perverse spirit. Loyalty is the embodiment of love directed toward a particular person or thing, and as the Scriptures make clear, it is the nature of our loves that matter most.[2]

And notice how such loyalty is cultivated. Most certainly not by lecture or detailed explanation. Loyalties are caught like the flu, not directly taught with many words. Cavalier loyalties were embodied by the tribe and, in due course, assimilated without question by the tribe’s children. Perhaps the clearest contemporary illustration of this phenomenon is the devotion to favored sporting teams that many fathers (and an increasing number of mothers) share with their children. How is such fanaticism cultivated? Weekends are structured around sacred rites performed on the field. Dress demonstrates loyalty. Hopes are elevated and dashed as the play unfolds. Emotions rise and fall accordingly. Cheers and outcries follow. Victories and defeats, as well as hopes for the coming week, are the subject of daily conversation. Children see, hear, share in the devotion and become fans (fanatics).

I must confess that I too am a fan with favored teams. And, I wonder, what would be the effect if our homes and schools manifest, in word and deed, the loyalty to Jesus of the most devoted fan? How would it affect the way we work, the way we talk, the way we dress, the way we celebrate, the way we grieve? And, how then would our children respond to "the Chief amongst ten thousand, the altogether lovely”?



[1] Cavaliers or Royalists were those who remained loyal to the Stuart kings, Charles I and Charles II, in England’s civil war which, between 1642 and 1651, pitted them against Oliver Cromwell and the forces of Parliament.

[2] Hosea 6:6, Matthew 22:36-40, 1 Corinthians 13:1-3, to name but a few verses concerning that which is a continuous Biblical theme.

 

Some Reflections on Reconciliation, Redemption, and the Resurrection

God who is Love, reconciled us to himself.

Man is not the center. God does not exist for the sake of man. Man does not exist for his own sake.1 ‘Thou has created all things and for  thy pleasure they are and were created.2
Love can forbear, and Love can forgive… but Love can never be reconciled to an unlovely object… He can never therefore be reconciled to your sin, because sin itself is incapable of being altered ; but He may be reconciled to your person, because that may be restored.3

The cross is Jesus’ work of redemption.       

He was delivered over to death for our sins and was raised to life for our justification.4
The central Christian belief is that Christ’s death has somehow put us right with God and given us a fresh start… Theories about Christ’s death are not Christianity: they are explanations about how it works…

We believe that the death of Christ is just the point in history at which something absolutely unimaginable from outside shows through into our world… You may ask what good it will be to us if we do not understand it. But that is easily answered. A man can eat his dinner without understanding exactly how food nourishes him. A man can accept what Christ has done without knowing how it works: indeed, he certainly would not know how it works until he has accepted it…

We are told that Christ was killed for us, that his death has washed out our sins, and that by dying He disabled death itself. That is the formula. That is Christianity. That is what has to be believed.5

The Resurrection is the standard of power in Christians’ lives.

That I may know him, and the power of his resurrection, and the fellowship of his sufferings, being made conformable unto his death;6

Now God designed the human machine to run on Himself. He Himself is the fuel our spirits were designed to burn, or the food our spirits were designed to feed on. There is no other. That is why it is just no good asking God to make us happy in our own way without bothering about religion. God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing.7

The more we get what we call ‘ourselves’ out of the way and let Him take us over, the more truly ourselves we become. There is so much of Him that millions and millions of ‘little Christs’, all different, will still be too few to express Him fully.

I am not, in  my natural state, nearly so much of a person as I like to believe: most of what I call ‘me’ can be very easily explained. It is when I turn to Christ, when I give myself up to His Personality, that I begin to have a real personality of my own.

Submit to death, death of your ambitions and favorite wishes every day and death of your whole body in the end: submit with every fiber of your being, and you will find eternal life. Keep back nothing. Nothing that you have not given away will be really yours. Nothing in you that has not died will ever be raised from the dead. Look for yourself, and you will find in the long run only hatred, loneliness, despair, rage, ruin, and decay. But look for Christ and you will find Him, and with Him  everything else thrown in.5

The whole point of three-dimensional life is to be played out in each of us. May this Easter bring us reconciliation to the truths of redemption and resurrection in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Bill and Maryellen St. Cyr

----------------------------------------------

1C S Lewis, The Problem of Pain, 40.
2Revelation 4:11
3Thomas Traherne, Centuries of Meditations, 11, 30.
4 Romans 4:25.
5C. S. Lewis, Mere Christianity, 54-55.
6Philippians 3:107
7C. S. Lewis, Mere Christianity, 50. 
8Ibid., 225-227.
 
*Resurrection by Luca Giordano

Under the Influence of Entertainment

I recently met a new student who made his way to Ambleside through an unusual series of events that began at a children’s home in Latvia. His integration into the sixth grade class, growing command of the English language, and benevolence toward others were delightful to see, and I wanted to offer encouragement to him. As I spoke to him, his smile grew wide and he responded, “I am so thankful to God.” I was touched by his genuine thankfulness and humility, a lovely reminder to turn our hearts and minds outward and upward, toward our God of provision, our friends and neighbors, and away from the awareness of “me.”

Charlotte Mason inspires us in the way of humility -

There are many ways of getting away from the thought of ourselves; the love and knowledge of birds and flowers, of clouds and stones, of all that nature has to show us; pictures, books, people, anything outside of us, will help us to escape from the tyrant who attacks our hearts. One rather good plan is, when we are talking or writing to our friends, not to talk or write about 'thou and I.' There are so many interesting things in the world to discuss that it is a waste of time to talk about ourselves. All the same, it is well to be up to the ways of those tiresome selves, and that is why you are invited to read these chapters. It is very well, too, to know that Humility, who takes no thought of himself, is really at home in each of us:––

"If that in sight of God is great
     Which counts itself for small,
     We by that law humility
     The chiefest grace must call;
     Which being such, not knows itself
     To be a grace at all."
     ––TRENCH.

Ourselves, Book I, 129-130

We share concerns for the children, yet we fall short of true humility and thankfulness in our own lives. How do we inspire and support a sense of caring, duty, thankfulness, and sacrifice? How are the influences of our modern world misdirecting our youth? As a teacher and a parent I have to ask myself, “How am I contributing to the problem?” My awareness of just one of these influences was kindled by a recent email.

The parent of a former student reached out to me to share a memory her child still has from the year she was in my class at Ambleside (my first year of teaching first grade).  She described the day I brought in George Washington Carver’s favorite food, “corndodgers” (as noted in our history readings). I was happy to hear that I was so fondly remembered, recalling the excitement of the students that day. But then I thought, “No! No! That was so off-method!” It had fueled days of begging and disappointment. “Are we having more corndodgers? Why not? Please!” I wonder if they even remember why we had the treats.

Some might say that I was well intentioned; that I was allowing my students to more fully experience a part of Carver’s life; that I was encouraging them to participate more fully in our studies. And back then I would have agreed. But now I see that entertaining activities often have deeper implications, and the end results are less than desirable. Entertainment turns our attention toward ourselves and makes it difficult, if not impossible, to experience a peaceful consideration and enjoyment of another’s delight.

Consider this text from Little House in the Big Woods when Jack Frost comes to visit.

Ma said that Jack Frost came in the night and made the pictures, while everyone was asleep. Laura thought that Jack Frost was a little man all snowy white, wearing a glittering white pointed cap and soft white knee-boots made of deer-skin. His coat was white and his mittens were white, and he did not carry a gun on his back, but in his hands he had shining sharp tools with which he carved the pictures.

Laura and Mary were allowed to take Ma's thimble and made pretty patterns of circles in the frost on the glass. But they never spoiled the pictures that Jack Frost had made in the night.     

When they put their mouths close to the pane and blew their breath on it, the white frost melted and ran in drops down the glass. Then they could see the drifts of snow outdoors and the great trees standing bare and black, making thin blue shadows on the white snow.

With the best of intentions we might think of ways to help the children share the experiences of the Ingalls girls. We sprinkle a baking sheet with sugar and invite the children to draw in it. Or we pull out hand mirrors to breathe on. These activities, though seemingly harmless, plant seeds of self focus. We lose something far greater and more important to our development as a person when we trade entertainment for the exploration of ideas. We miss out on a practice of reflecting and imagining; on wondering about the experiences of another; on delighting in another’s delight without any thoughts of self. Using this example, we miss out on sharing the wonder and experience of that wintery morning long ago through the words of the author. Under the influence of entertainment, the attention immediately turns to thoughts of Me: “I like this! This is fun! Can I have another turn? Can we do this again?”

Isn’t this the mindset we are hoping to shed in ourselves and in our children? Don’t we want to pursue a life of humility? As followers of Christ we are called to die to self and seek to serve. Let us redirect our thoughts and hearts to a higher place where, with the inspiration of the Spirit and through the exploration of ideas, we too may experience each new day with a deep thankfulness to God. 

"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit.

Rather, in humility value others above yourselves,

not looking to your own interests

but each of you to the interests of the others."    

Philippians 2: 3-4

 

 

Living Ideas

As teachers at an Ambleside school, we are all familiar with the phrase “living ideas.” We know that real learning occurs when the learner wonders, asking why and how. The joy is in discovery. I imagine God rejoices with us in our discovering. He didn’t pre-program us like robots. He made us able to grow through memorable and “living” ideas. God doesn’t place pearls along the seashore, washed up where we can easily find them. He creates each unique one within the sacred shell of an oyster, deep at the bottom of the ocean. Diamonds also are hidden deep within the depths of great mountains, where miners must labor and dig to find them. One can only conclude that His joy in our discovering must be abundant. In this same way, we must search out these living ideas that come from God through His Holy Spirit.

What are these “living ideas” that Charlotte Mason tells us about? She begins by describing what living ideas are not. They are not lectures for hours on end of pre-digested information or lists of facts to memorize. If I begin to observe glassy-eyed stares in the faces of my students as they look back at me, I know I’ve gotten off track and away from what the author has to say. I’m talking too much, and the students are tuning out because of information (idea-lacking) overload. Rather, they delight in the work of thinking. When my students connect with living ideas and do the work of narrating or telling back what they know, they are engaged with the author and these living ideas that come through the text. They leave class with knowledge and are satisfied by this work of their mind. Their mind has been fed and nourished with stimulating thoughts and notions.

Charlotte Mason says that living ideas are ideas derived from living minds. I discovered that C.S. Lewis agreed with Charlotte Mason that living ideas are not just mere facts. Lewis explained that, while reason is the natural organ of truth, imagination is the organ of meaning. In other words, we do not really grasp the meaning of any words or concept until we have a clear image in our mind that we can connect with. This is part of the work of narration and digesting ideas. The students paint a picture in their mind from the words in the text.

Some barriers to living ideas, says Mason, are that children are born ignorant of the world and how to manifest the infinite possibilities with which they are born. Lewis adds that human nature gets in the way. God is the great hedonist, providing things for us to do all day long. However, we may neglect the important things, such as working and worshipping and instead, do other things, such as playing. He concludes, “Our Lord finds our desires not too strong but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink, sex, and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”

So, how do we get the children to leave their mud pies? We give them meaningful ideas to digest. Charlotte Mason says there are two ways to share living ideas. The first is a “vital spark” flashed from teacher to pupil, but this only occurs when the subject is one to which the teacher has given original thought. For example, my children love our pastor. When I asked them why, they said that she explains a concept with a story to help them understand. Since we can’t hire a dozen teachers for each subject, such as an art historian to teach about Degas or other masters, we must provide books for our students, which are rich in living ideas. Last semester, my students read Carry on Mr. Bowditch, which tells the story about Nathaniel Bowditch, the father of Maritime Navigation. By way of the vivid text full of living ideas, they went sailing with Nathaniel Bowditch, and came to know and formed a relationship with the father of Maritime Navigation.

Lewis loved reading stories as much as writing them. He said, “Those of us who have been true readers all our life seldom fully realize the enormous extension of our being which we owe to authors. We realize it best when we talk with an unliterary friend. He may be full of goodness and good sense but he inhabits a tiny world. In it, we should be suffocated. The man who is contented to be only himself, and therefore less a self, is in prison. My own eyes are not enough for me, I will see through those of others . . . in reading great literature I become a thousand men and yet remain myself. Like a night sky in the Greek poem, I see with a myriad eyes, but it is still I who see. Here, as in worship, in love, in moral action, and in knowing, I transcend myself; and am never more myself than when I do."

I believe in Christianity as I believe the sun has risen,

not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything.

With these simple thoughts, let us illuminate our students’ minds with living ideas through which they will come to see everything else.

 

 

Presidents Day: A Reflection on Humility

One of the most damaging trends in recent history is the tendency to select dazzling, celebrity leaders.

Jim Collins, Good to Great

In his compelling book exploring the attributes of companies that made the jump “from good to great,” Jim Collins notes the profound impact of leadership. Great companies are led by Level 5 leaders. These leaders are “resolved to do whatever it takes to make the company great, no matter how big or hard the decisions,” but they “attribute success to factors other than themselves.” In contrast, Level 4 leader’s work “will always be first and foremost about what they get – fame, fortune, adulation, power, whatever – not what they build, create and contribute.”

It is tempting to reflect upon the pre and post Super Bowl performances of the brash young quarterback who took the field with a Superman logo upon his chest; in stark contrast to the humility of his veteran opponent. On another, more important front, one wonders, “What kind of a leadership will our presidential hopefuls provide?” Charlotte Mason reminds us of the necessity of humility.

For humility is absolute, not relative. It is by no means a taking of our place among our fellows according to a given scale, some being above us by many grades and others as far below. There is no reference to above or below in the humble soul, which is equally humble before an infant, a primrose, a worm, a beggar, a prince... Humility does not think much or little of itself; it does not think of itself at all. It is a negative rather than a positive quality, being an absence of self-consciousness rather than the presence of any distinctive virtue. The person who is unaware of himself is capable of all lowly service, of all suffering for others, of bright cheerfulness under all the small crosses and worries of everyday life. This is the quality that makes heroes, and this is the quality that makes saints. (Charlotte Mason, Parents and Children)

Fondly do we consider the two presidents whom we honor today. As young men, both were brash (perhaps not so unlike our young quarterback). But they allowed life to season them, and being humbled, they became humble. And, by the end, worthy of admiration. Consider their words:

Though, in reviewing the incidents of my administration, I am unconscious of intentional error, I am nevertheless too sensible of my defects not to think it probable that I may have committed many errors. Whatever they may be, I fervently beseech the Almighty to avert or mitigate the evils to which they may tend. I shall also carry with me the hope that my country will never cease to view them with indulgence; and that, after forty-five years of my life dedicated to its service with an upright zeal, the faults of incompetent abilities will be consigned to oblivion, as myself must soon be to the mansions of rest. (George Washington, Farewell Address)

Fondly do we hope, fervently do we pray, that this mighty scourge of war may speedily pass away. Yet, if God wills that it continue until all the wealth piled by the bondsman's two hundred and fifty years of unrequited toil shall be sunk, and until every drop of blood drawn with the lash shall be paid by another drawn with the sword, as was said three thousand years ago, so still it must be said "the judgments of the Lord are true and righteous altogether." With malice toward none, with charity for all, with firmness in the right as God gives us to see the right, let us strive on to finish the work we are in, to bind up the nation's wounds, to care for him who shall have borne the battle and for his widow and his orphan, to do all which may achieve and cherish a just and lasting peace among ourselves and with all nations. (Abraham Lincoln, Second Inaugural Address)

 

 

"George Washington Crossing the Delaware" by Emanuel Leutze

Thoughts on Love

My dear children, let us not love in word, neither with the tongue, but in deed and in truth. 1 John 3:18

As we choose to walk the pilgrim path to Christ and our true home, we often wonder. What is my calling? What is God’s will for my life? We may even fret and worry and become anxious, because we don’t seem to have an answer, or the answers come too slowly for our liking. We don’t ‘hear’ Him, or if we do, we’re not absolutely sure that we know what He’s telling us. We may spend much time wondering, when the answer is quite simple, really. In the wondering, and while we wait, we must love. LOVE. We must love God with our whole heart and soul and mind. In loving God and coming to understand His great love for us, we learn to love ourselves. As we love God and ourselves, we are able to love our ‘neighbor.’ In this, He mercifully gives us a work to do that is outside of ourselves, because He knows our tendencies toward selfishness. The good news and great blessing is that we can love—we have it in us--“because He first loved us.[1]” The truth is that we have the ability and power to love. If we are Christ followers, we have no alternative . . . we have no other option . . . but to love. God IS Love. We are the instruments of His Love.

Have you ever thrown a stone into the water and watched the circles about it spread? As a matter of fact, they spread to the very shores of the pond or lake or sea into which you have thrown the stone; more, they affect the land on the further side. But those distant circles become so faint that they are imperceptible, while those nearest the point where you have thrown in the stone are clearly marked.

So it is with our Love.

It is as if, in the first place, our home were the stone thrown in to move our being; and from that central point the circle of our love widens until it embraces all men.

No one, excepting our Lord Jesus Christ, ever knew how much he could love, or how much he could do for Love's sake; but the soldier who goes into the thick of the fight to rescue his comrade, at the risk of his own life; the mother who watches her sick child, and would give her life many times over to save it from suffering; the nurse who spends herself, body and soul, in ministering to the sick,––these know just a little of how much love there is in the human heart.[2]

What a beautiful picture! Imagine the ripples in the water from the stone spreading to the shores and affecting the land. Charlotte Mason points us even to love with excellence. She gives us the greater vision of the vast potential of our love. What is the effect of our loving? Her faith and love for God are vibrant in her words, and she understands that we are the vessels God uses to love the world—ultimately with the hope of embracing all men. That is the goal. That is a prize. If we ‘throw our stone’ by dwelling in love, it will transcend all. We may not have the experience of the soldier or the nurse, but most of us have experienced caring for a sick child or friend or family member. So, how do we show true love? How may we love with a ripple effect?

Love delights in the Goodness of Another—Love delights in the person who is beloved . . . and before all things in the goodness of the person beloved, and would not, for any price, make his friend less loving to all, less dutiful, less serviceable. To influence his friend towards unworthy ways would seem to Love like burning his own house about his head.

Years ago, I attended the funeral of a much older friend. As I was walking down the hall on my way out of the church, I saw that it was raining outside. I felt compelled to express my great disappointment with the rain and dreariness aloud to the first person I passed. As soon as the words left my lips, the wise response came from the older woman before me, “Well, you know dear, God sends the rain.” For a brief but profound moment, our eyes met, and her words penetrated my soul. My negative and selfish view of the world at that moment, even though seemingly harmless, had affected the atmosphere. Seeing the look in her eyes, I felt sadness for my words and their effect. This older woman reminded me that my disappointments and expression of them didn’t bring goodness. She made me aware that my “unworthy ways” had influence, and she quickly and lovingly stopped their influence from going any further! We must be conscientious and consider whether our words and our actions influence others towards worthy ways. If not, then we must be responsible to change them before we hurt someone else and cause them to stumble.

Seeks the Happiness of his Friend—Again, Love seeks the happiness of the beloved, and shrinks from causing uneasiness to his friend by fretful or sullen tempers, jealousy or mistrust.

Happiness isn’t the pleasant-feeling kind of happiness—when it’s a sunny day and everything is going our way. This happiness that Charlotte Mason describes has the integrity of another person in mind—and proposes that we are responsible for influencing a friend or beloved either in a positive and edifying way or in a negative and degrading one. The admonishment is perhaps to consider more closely what our motives are—if they are rooted in true love and with another person’s well-being, reputation, and spirit in mind. This is a much higher and nobler kind of happiness.

Sister Mary Mercedes in A Book of Courtesy described it this way, “…Conveying your support through a sympathetic smile or a friendly touch can help a friend through a bad time. Tactful behavior springs from the heart, from the desire to put others at ease and make them comfortable, even in awkward or difficult situations . . . A strong friendship can teach the meaning of unselfishness. A healthy friendship calls for what is best in us and stimulates us to our highest endeavors . . . In order to grow, friendships need loyalty, love, mutual consideration, and willingness to see the other’s point of view.”[3]

Seeks to be Worthy.—Love seeks to be worthy of his friend; and as the goodness of his friend is his delight, so he will himself grow in goodness for the pleasure of his friend.

In the seventh grade, we read the narrative poem The Courtship of Miles Standish by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow. In this story we get a glimpse of this worthiness in the friendship of John Alden, when he must deliver a marriage proposal to his beloved Priscilla, but the proposal of marriage is from his friend and comrade, Captain Miles Standish. As he pens a letter for his mentor, John Alden realizes with great turmoil and sorrow that they share admiration and affection for the same woman. We learn that the captain was not afraid of bullets or the shot from the mouth of a cannon, but he was terribly afraid of a "thundering “No!” point-blank from the mouth of a woman,” and Miles Standish, having no idea of the conflict of interest, begs John Alden to deliver the marriage proposal to Priscilla. John Alden must quickly make a decision, and in that instant he chooses to sacrifice his own interests for those of his friend. Longfellow tells us,

“The name of friendship is sacred; What you demand in that name, I have not the power to deny you!” So the strong will prevailed, subduing and moulding the gentler, Friendship prevailed over love, and Alden went on his errand.[4]

John Alden proved himself a worthy friend.

Desires to Serve.—Once more, Love desires to give and serve; the gifts and the service vary with the age and standing of the friends; the child will bring the gift of obedience, the parent may have to offer the service of rebuke, but the thought of service is always present in Love. “Love not in word, neither in tongue,” says the Apostle, “but in deed and in truth; that is, perhaps, “Do not rest content with the mere expression of love, whether in word or caress, but show your love in service and in confidence”’ for the love that does not trust is either misplaced or unworthy. Love has other signs, no doubt, but these are true of all true love, whether between parent and child, friend and friend, married lovers, or between those who labour for the degraded and distressed and those for whom they labour. Let us notice the word degradation: it is literally to step from, to step down, and it is really a word of hope, for if it is possible to step down, it is also possible to step up again. All the great possibilities of Love are in every human heart, and to touch the spring, one must give Love.

During this time of Lent, when we seek God in the quiet moments, let us consider service as an act of giving Love for God and for man. We can feed the hungry, give drink to the thirsty, visit the imprisoned or sick. We can comfort the sorrowful, hear wrongs patiently, and forgive all injuries. Or we can make simple, quiet gestures by just saying ‘hello’ to the people we encounter on the street or at the counter in the store. Hold the door, smile, extend courtesy knowing no one may even notice or offer it in return--and, if we see someone in need, may we overcome the 'awkwardness,' and be the one to give the helping hand. May we be ever watchful for ways to be the hands and feet of Jesus and vessels from whom His love freely flows like the ripple from the stone.

 

 

 



[1] 1 John 4:19

[2]  Charlotte Mason, Ourselves

[3] A Book of Courtesy, Sister Mary Mercedes, O.P.

[4] The Courtship of Miles Standish, Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

 

To Listen

Have you ever been in the fields on a spring day, and heard nothing at all but your own voice and the voices of your companions, and then, perhaps, suddenly you have become silent, and you find a concert going on of which you had not heard a note? At first you hear the voices of the birds; then, by degrees, you perceive high voices, low voices, and middle voices, small notes and great notes, and you begin to wish you knew who sang each of the songs you can distinguish.” [1]     

How often it is that we go through life missing the simple pleasures.  Our focus is on ourselves; our thoughts, our plans and our concerns--failing to hear the joy around us.  Here, Charlotte Mason reminds us to be fully present and to listen.

Miss Mason’s idyllic picture of being “in the fields on a spring day” is far from the reality of most 21st century lives.  Although being in the fields on a spring day, or most days for that matter, would do us all good.  Yet, I believe there is a deeper, more universal truth in her words. 

Miss Mason writes about suddenly becoming silent in order to notice the concert going on around us.  The concert to which she refers has a musical quality and in it she describes the voices of the birds-- “high voices, low voices, and middle voices, small notes and great notes…”  Too often we are so focused on our own internal voice that we fail to notice the variety and beauty of the sounds beyond ourselves.  In nature, there are the sounds of the birds, the insects, and the leaves rustling in the trees--a refreshing melody indeed; and yet, how often do we miss the concert of the children in our midst? 

Are the sounds of the children really noticed like Miss Mason is asking us to notice the voices of the birds?  Do we quiet our own voice long enough in order to “suddenly become silent” and notice?  What are the sounds of our children’s voices?  Who has the high voices, the low voices, the middle voices?  Who speaks the small notes and the great notes? 

“Do you know the footfall of everybody in the house? … Do you listen to people's voices, and can you tell by the intonation whether the people are sad or glad, pleased or displeased?” [2]

Each one of us longs to know and to be known.  As parents and educators our job is not just to hear our children, but to listen.  Who are they?  What are they really trying to say?  What makes them distinct in this world?  What sounds are uniquely theirs?  What utterances will we miss when our home or classroom is empty?

“There is a great deal of joy, again, to be had out of listening--joy which many people miss…” [3]

We all too important adults have a knack for missing the obvious.  We tend to neglect the simple joy of listening. Every day is an opportunity to “suddenly become silent” and notice.  There is a concert going on around us.  Will we listen?


[1-3] Mason, Charlotte, Ourselves (Vol. 4), pg. 29-30

"Three Children" by George Bellows (image)

The Discipline of Habits

By "education is a discipline," we mean the discipline of habits, formed definitely and thoughtfully, whether habits of mind or body.

In a recent conversation with Bill and Maryellen St. Cyr, who are the co-founders of Ambleside Schools International, Bill stated that it was equally as easy for a child to put his clothes in the hamper after changing as it was for him to drop them on the floor. As a mom of three, I was intrigued! He went on to state that in such situations the determining factor is the child’s habit. Children with the habit of putting put. Children with the habit of dropping drop. Now, I can certainly instruct one of my children to pick his clothes up placing them in the hamper, and I can ensure that it is done. But what happens when I’m not there to see it through?  What is my child’s true habit?  And in this scenario, how much do I want to bless my son’s future spouse?

Any reflection on our own experience makes it clear that habits are powerful. Currently, there is great interest in the nature of habits and how they shape our lives. The Power of Habit has been on the New York Times bestseller list for 64 consecutive weeks.  In her writings, Charlotte Mason used the phrase, “a habit is ten natures.”  Imagine your nature and the power of your “natural impulses” – then multiply by ten.   Such is the strength of a well-developed habit.  She uses the metaphor of a locomotive and the rails upon which it runs.  Once the rails are laid, the locomotive runs smoothly along the path set before it.  A life ordered upon good, healthy “rails” is a life that runs powerfully and beautifully, without the effort of decision or the need for spontaneous (and potentially impulsive) choice. 

So what are these good, healthy habits that are worth instilling in ourselves and in our children?  In her book, Ourselves, Charlotte Mason speaks of the individual as a “great estate.” She elaborates on the idea that as a person we should govern ourselves as a kingdom would be governed, to allow for the highest and best way of living.  Habits of the mind, habits of the heart, and habits of the body are essential to a well-run estate.  Unfortunately, there is no quick “Top 10” list of habitual behaviors to develop that will leave us mature and prepared for what may come our way.  Instead, it is a working out of principles that bring a full and beautiful life.  At Ambleside, we spend much time focusing on these principles. Rather than developing persons who are able to study well for the specific exam, we are interested in helping students develop a life of study. We believe school is not just an institution to get through, rather a place to develop a love of learning.  Order, imagination, thankfulness, and obedience – these are all principles that Charlotte Mason believed could be developed into habits.   

Well, the million-dollar question is: how are habits developed?  We all have habits we wish we didn't’ have and that seem impossible to break. And we all can point to habits we wish we had but cannot seem to master. Charlotte Mason suggests that habit development requires three tools:  tact, watchfulness, and persistence.  A new habit is rarely brought on by force.  It takes thoughtfulness and consideration as the idea of the habit is introduced. The idea may be introduced either by a purposeful mentoring or by the frequent and casual sowing such that the desired idea “invests the child’s atmosphere”. After the idea is present, watchfulness becomes the key to making the new behavior “stick”.  As a teacher or parent, we must be watching for lapses in behavior and for opportunities to continue to inspire toward this habit formation.  Persistence plays right into this watchfulness.  Once a new behavior or response has begun, we must watch for lapses and require persistent behavior until this habit becomes second nature.  If we are not careful, we can quickly undo the work that has been done.  In Philosophy of Education, Mason shares this practical example:

A boy is late who has been making evident efforts to be punctual; the teacher good-naturally foregoes rebuke or penalty, and the boy says to himself, ––"It doesn't matter," and begins to form the unpunctual habit. The mistake the teacher makes is to suppose that to be punctual is troublesome to the boy, so he will let him off; whereas the office of the habits of an ordered life is to make such life easy and spontaneous; the effort is confined to the first half dozen or score of occasions for doing the thing.

Maryellen St. Cyr noted that well-developed habits are gifts we can give our students; gifts they will keep with them for the rest of their life.  These gifts will serve our students well, empowering a good and beautiful life.  We have established that habits are powerful, and if they are well placed, they can set a person on course for better ways of living. If this is the case, why don’t more people make a concerted effort to develop the needed healthy, good habits as a way of life?  It takes work.  But, if we imagine the locomotive and its smooth sailing along the lines of good habit, we will soon decide that it’s worth it – for us and the ones we love.   

Whether we are developing habits of study, or picking up the laundry, habits are a gift we give to those we love.

 

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